I’ll Break

The spiteful insults
Every hurtful name
Each nasty remark
All add up in the end
But you don’t see
Nor do you care
You ignore the tears
Pretend I’m not there
One day I’ll crack
I’ll crumbled and fall
Someday I’ll break
Will you notice I’m gone?

First Love

I love him like the clouds love the rain.
He’s a sweet talking controversy
With a mesmerizing face.
I could play him every song
With my heart on my sleeve.
And I would catch every falling
Star for him, so beautiful.

But no, he got no clue.
And he struggles to understand why
He thinks he’s not strong enough.
But I know better, a secret endeavor.
He’s more than just a first love.

Staying up late writing love letters
Sealed with my heart and hope.
He’s got a laugh that can turn my world
Around and a stare of pure gold.
It’s not easy being with Mr. Perfect, but it’s a war
We have to go through.
Old stitches undone is a price
And I’ll bleed forever and a day to stand by you.

And I would become the pill to his pain.
The cloud to his rain if he wanted to.

And he’s always on my mind.
My god, he’s so beautiful.

And we’re running out of time.

But even when you’re long gone,
I’ll keep waiting forever…
And a day.

Because you’ve got no clue.
Oh, no clue to just how much I love you.
I live to let you shine and you may wonder
Why?…
It’s because you’re more than just a first love.
I love you!
I love you!
I love you!
…I do….

Controling My Feelings For Too Long

Through Your Eyes I Ask For Something Warm

In Hope, I Reach For You

Expecting You Are Everything I Have Wished For

Afraid That You Are Nothing that My Dreams Demand

I Hide All My Feelings, And Remain Silent

But When I Hear Your Voice, When I See You

I Know That You Are Something Far Greater than I Could Ever WIsh For.

I Know,

Together, We Are Invincible.

But How Can I Tell You That?

With Unconditional Love

You’re the only one I love
one in my mind,
one within my heart,
My only love, for all time.

No one else could ever take your place,
Truly, you’re far beyond compare,
And no matter what happens between us,
For you, I will always care.

With every moment you hold me close,
Whenever I’m in your arms,
I know love would never be the same,
If you and I were torn apart.

And, though, at times I may seem distant,
I’m not that far away,
For my heart is always with you,
With you, my love will stay.

I’m hoping for forever,
But we both know that’s such a long time,
Still, I can’t see you with any other,
So promise… you’ll always be mine.

If what I feel, words could express,
To let you know love’s true meaning,
I know I’d have much to say,
But no words could explain my feelings.

Just remember, you promised you’d never leave,
You swore you’d never love another,
You gave me your word that it would always be me,
Inevitably… we’ll last forever.

You’re the only one I love,
The only one on my mind,
With unconditional love,
You’ll be my only love… for all time.

-noxxie-me-

GEN’s repost

Let me love you

Once upon a time, there was once a guy who was very much in love with this girl. This romantic guy folded 1,000 pieces of papercranes as a gift to his girl. Although, at that time he was just a small executive in his company, his future doesn’t seemed too bright, they were very happy together. Until one day, his girl told him she was going to Paris and will never come back. She also told him that she cannot visualise any future for the both of them, so let’s go their own ways there and then… heartbroken, the guy agreed.

When he regained his confidence, he worked hard day and night, slogging his body and mind just to make something out of himself. Finally with all these hardwork and with the help of friends, this guy had set up his own company…

“You never fail until you stop trying.” he always told himself. “I must make it in life!”
One rainy day, while this guy was driving, he saw an elderly couple sharing an umbrella in the rain walking to some destination. Even with the umbrella, they were still drenched. It didn’t take him long to realise those were his ex-girlfriend’s parents. With a heart in getting back at them, he drove slowly beside the couple, wanting them to spot him in his luxury sedan. He wanted them to know that he wasn’t the same anymore, he had his own company, car, condo, etc. He had made it in life!

Before the guy can realise, the couple was walking towards a cemetary,and he got out of his car and followed them…and he saw his ex-girlfriend, a photograph of her smiling sweetly as ever at him from her tombstone… and he saw his precious papercranes in a bottle placed beside her tomb. Her parents saw him. He walked over and asked them why this had happened. They explained, she did not leave for France at all. She was stricken ill with cancer. In her heart, she had believed that he will make it someday, but she did not want her illness to be his obstacle … therefore she had chosen to leave him.

She had wanted her parents to put his papercranes beside her, because, if the day comes when fate brings him to her again he can take some of those back with him. The guy just wept …the worst way to miss someone is to be sitting right beside them but knowing you can’t have them and will never see them again.
The End.”

A tragic story that perhaps happens only in the movies. At the end of the day, money is money is money but love is divine. In our quest for our material wealth, take time to make time for our loved ones. There will be a time when we have only memories to cling to.
Take this weekend to show our “love” to all that are close to us.

She was not beautiful

She was not beautiful. Nothing about her was extraordinary. Nothing about her made her stand out in a crowd. She grew up in a family of six and being the eldest, she learned responsibility at an early age.

As she grew stronger and brighter, she instilled a sort of light and cheer to whomever she met. She was not beautiful, but she made others feel better about themselves. She meets a rebel boy who thinks he is all man, befriending him, she teaches him. She teaches him how to read and a little boost, the ‘man’ needed to go to college, they become fast friends and she fell fast in love with her rugged handsome student.

The ‘man’ then finds himself in love with a girl. A girl who was so beautiful. Her hair was a hallow of light around her. Her eyes the bluest blue of the ocean. ‘Like an angel’ he tells his tutor ‘like a beautiful angel.’ The girl swallows a lump at her throat. She was not beautiful, she did not posses the heart of the one he loved, but she did not care. As long as he was happy, she would be happy, or so she tried to. She helped write the most beautiful letters to his angel. All the time visioning it was she herself receiving those very letters. And so the girl helped him choose the right clothes, say the right words, and buy the right gifts for his angel.

His angel brought him much joy and much pain to the girl who cried behind her smiles. But that never stopped her from giving more than she will ever receive. Then one day, the angel he loved left him for another man. A richer more successful man. The boy was stunned. He was so hurt, he did not speak for days. The girl went to him. He cried on her shoulder and she cried with him.

He was hurt and she was too. Time went by and so wounds heal. The boy realizes something about his friend/tutor. Something he never realized before. How her laughter sounded heavenly and how her smiles brightened up the darkest days, or how simply beautiful she looked to him!

Beautiful. This plain, simple girl was beautiful to him. And he began to fall. Fall so in love with this beautiful girl. On one day, he picked up all his courage to see her. He walked to her house, nervous, and fidgeting, Running his thoughts over and over his head.

He was going to tell her how beautiful she was to him. He was going to tell her how wonderfully in love he was with her. He knocked. No one was home.

The next day, he found out that the beautiful girl he fell in love with had a brain tumor that put her into a coma. The doctors were grim and the family decided to let her go.

One final time he got to see her. He held her hand. He stroked her hair and he cried for this beautiful girl. He cried, but it was too late. The beautiful girl was buried and the heavens broke. Out a beautiful spring shower, a cry for their loss. She was the most beautiful girl in the world and she had taught the rebel boy-man to love and what it is to be loved.

She was the most beautiful girl in the world.

John Blanchard stood up from the bench, straightened his Army uniform, and studied the crowd of people making their way through Grand Central Station. He looked for the girl whose heart he knew, but whose face he didn’t, the girl with the rose. His interest in her had begun thirteen months before in a Florida library. Taking a book off the shelf he found himself intrigued, not with the words of the book, but with the notes penciled in the margin. The soft handwriting reflected a thoughtful soul and insightful mind.

In front of the book, he discovered the previous owner’s name, Miss Hollis Maynell. With time and effort he located her address. She lived in New York City. He wrote her a letter introducing himself and inviting her to correspond. The next day he was shipped overseas for service in World War II

During the next year and one-month the two grew to know each other through the mail. Each letter was a seed falling on a fertile heart. A Romance was budding. Blanchard requested a photograph, but she refused. She felt that if he really cared, it wouldn’t matter what she looked like.

When the day finally came for him to return from Europe, they scheduled their first meeting - 7:00 pm at Grand Central Station in New York.

“You’ll recognize me, ” she wrote, “by the red rose I’ll be wearing on my lapel.” So at 7:00 he was in the station looking for a girl whose heart he loved, but whose face he’d never seen.

I’ll let Mr. Blanchard tell you what happened: A young women was coming toward me, her figure long and slim. Her blonde hair lay back in curls from her delicate ears; her eyes were blue as flowers. Her lips and chin had a gentle firmness, and in her pale green suit she was like springtime come alive. I started toward her, entirely forgetting to notice that she was not wearing a rose. As I moved, a small, provocative smile curved her lips. “Going my way, sailor?” she murmured. Almost uncontrollably I made one step closer to her, and then I saw Hollis Maynell. She was standing almost directly behind the girl. A women well past 40, she had graying hair tucked under a worn hat. She was more than plump, her thick-ankled feet thrust into low-heeled shoes. The girl in the green suit was walking quickly away. I felt as though I split in two, so keen was my desire to follow her, and yet so deep was my longing for the women whose spirit had truly companioned me and upheld my own

And there she stood. Her pale, plump face was gentle and sensible, her gray eyes had a warm and kindly twinkle. I did not hesitate. My fingers gripped the small worn blue leather copy of the book that was something precious, something perhaps even better than love, a friendship for which I had been and must ever be grateful.

I squared my shoulders and saluted and held out the book to the women, even though while I spoke I felt choked by the bitterness of my disappointment. “I’m Lieutenant John Blanchard, and you must be Miss Maynell. I am so glad you could meet me; may I take you to dinner?”

The women’s face broadened into a tolerant smile. “I don’t know what this is about, son,” she answered, “but the young lady in the green suit who just went by, she begged me to wear this rose on my coat. And she said if you were to ask me out to dinner, I should go and tell you that she is waiting for you in the big restaurant across the street. She said it was some kind of test!”

It all started when I was 6 years old. While I was playing outside on my farm in California, I met a boy. He was an average kind of boy who teased you and then you chased them and beat them up. After that first meeting in which I beat him up we kept on meeting and beating each other up at the fence. That only lasted for a little while though. We would meet at the fence all the time and we were always together.

I would tell him all my secrets. He was very quiet he would just listen to what I had to say. I found him easy to talk to and I could talk to him about everything. In school we had separate friends but when we got home we would always talk about what happened in school. One day I said to him that a guy I liked hurt me and broke my heart. He just comforted me and said everything would be okay. He gave me words of encouragement and helped me get over him. I was happy and thought of him as a real friend. But I knew that there was something else about him that I liked. I thought of it that night and figured it was just a friend kinda thing that I was feeling.

All through high school and even through graduation we’re always together and of course I thought of it as being friends. But I knew deep inside that I really felt differently. On graduation night even though we had different dates to the prom I wanted to be with him. That night after everybody went home I went to his house and wanted to tell him that I wanted to see him. Well, that night was my big chance and all I did was just sit there with him watching the stars and talking about what I was going to do and what he was going to do. I looked into his eyes and listened to him talk about what his dream was. How he wanted to get married and settle down. He said how he wanted to be rich and successful. All I could do was to tell him my dream and cuddle next to him.

I went home hurting because I didn’t tell him how I was feeling. I wanted to tell him so bad that I loved him but I was too scared and frightened. I let my feelings go and told myself that someday I would tell him just how I felt. All through college I wanted to tell him but he always had someone with him. After graduation he got a job in New York, I was happy for him but at the same time I was sad to see him go. I was sad also because I didn’t tell him how I felt. But I couldn’t let him know now that he was leaving for his big job. So I just kept it to myself and watched him go on the plane. I cried as I hugged him for what I felt was going to be the last time. I went home that night and cried my eyes out. I felt hurt that I didn’t tell him what I had inside my heart.

Well, I got a job as a secretary and then worked my way to a computer analyst. I was proud of what I had accomplished. One day I got a letter with an invitation to a marriage. It was from him, I was happy and sad at the same time. Now I know that I could never be with him and that we could only be friends. I went to the wedding the next month. It was a big occasion. The big church wedding and the reception at the hotel. I met the bride and of course him. I fell in love one more time. But I held back so it wouldn’t spoil what should be the happiest day in his life. I tried to have fun that night but it was killing me inside watching him being so happy and me trying to be happy covering up my sadness tears inside of me.I left New York feeling that I did the right thing. Before I left on the flight, he came running out of nowhere and said his good-byes and how he was very happy to see me. I came home and just tried to forget about what went on in New York. I had to go on with my life. As the years went on, we wrote to each other on what was going on and how he had missed talking to me. On one occasion he never wrote back to me at all. I was getting worried as to why he hadn’t written anything for a long time after I had already written 6 letters to him. Well, just when everything seemed hopeless and sad in my life, I got a note that said: “meet me at the fence where we used to talk about things”. I went and saw him there. I was happy to see him, but he was broken-hearted and sad inside. We hugged until we couldn’t breathe anymore.

Then he told me about the divorce and why he hadn’t written for a long time. He cried until he couldn’t cry anymore. Finally, we went back to the house and talked and laughed about what I had been going and to catch up on old times. But in all of this, I couldn’t tell him how I felt about him. In the days that followed, he had fun and forgot about all his problem and his divorce. I fell in love again with him. When it came time for him to leave back to New York, I went to see him off and cried. I hated to see him leave. He promised to see me every time he could get a vacation. I couldn’t wait for him to come so I could be with him. We would always have fun when we were together.

One day he didn’t show up like he said he would. I figured that he might have been busy. The days turned into months and I just forgot about it. Then I got a call one day from a lawyer in New York. The lawyer said that he had died in a car accident going to the airport. And that it took this long till everything was settled. It broke my heart. I was shocked about what took place. Now I knew why he didn’t come that day. Again, I was broken-hearted. I cried that night, cried tears of sadness and heartache. Asking questions why did this happen to a kind guy like him?

I gathered my things and went to New York for the reading of his will. Of course, things were given to his family and his ex-wife. I finally got to meet her since the last time we met at the wedding. She explained to me how he was and how he always provided. But he was always unhappy. She would always try everything but she couldn’t get him happy, as he was that night at their wedding. When the will was read, the one thing that was given to me was a diary. It was a diary that of his life. I cried as it was given to me. I didn’t know what to think. Why was this given to me? I took it and flew back to California. As I flew on the plane I remembered the good times that we had together. I started reading the diary and what was written.

The diary was started with the day we first met. I read on till I started to cry. The diary told of him saying that he had fallen in love with me that day I was broken-hearted. But he was too afraid to tell me what he had felt. That is why he was so quiet and liked to listen to me. It told of how he wanted to tell me so many times, but was too afraid to say anything. It told of when he went to New York and fell in love with another. How the happiest time he had was seeing me and dancing with me at the wedding. He said he imagined it was our wedding. How he was always unhappy till he had no choice but to divorce his wife. How the best time in his life was to read the letters written to him by me. Finally, the diary ended when it said, “today I will tell her I love her”. It was the day he was killed. The day I was going to finally find out what was really in his heart.

BLIND ITEM

There was a blind girl who hated herself just because she was blind. She hated everyone, except her loving boyfriend. He was always there for her. She said that if she could only see the world, she would marry her boyfriend.

One day, someone donated a pair of eyes to her and then she could see everything, including her boyfriend.
Her boyfriend asked her, “now that you can see the world, will you marry me?” The girl was shocked when she saw that her boyfriend was blind too, and refused to marry him.

Her boyfriend walked away in tears, and later wrote a letter to her saying….. “Just take care of my eyes dear.” i’ll always love you forever..

SILENT LOVE

From the very Begining, the girl’s family objected strongly on her dating this guy. Saying that it has got to do with family background & that the girl will have to suffer for the rest of her life if she were to be with him.

Due to family’s pressure, the couple quarrel very often. Though the girl love the guy deeply, but she always ask him: “How deep is your love for me?”

As the guy is not good with his words, this often cause the girl to be very upset. With that & the family’s pressure, the girl often vent her anger on him. As for him, he only endure it in silence.

After a couple of years, the guy finally graduated & decided to further his studies in overseas. Before leaving, he proposed to the girl: “I’m not very good with words. But all I know is that I love you. If you allow me, I will take care of you for the rest of my life. As for your family, I’ll try my best to talk them round. Will you marry me?”

The girl agreed, & with the guy’s determination, the family finally gave in & agreed to let them get married. So before he leave, they got engaged.

The girl went out to the working society, whereas the guy was overseas, continuing his studies. They sent their love through emails & phone calls. Though it’s hard, but both never thought of giving up.

One day, while the girl was on her way to work, she was knocked down by a car that lost control. When she woke up, she saw her parents beside her bed. She realised that she was badly injured. Seeing her mum crying, she wanted to comfort her. But she realized that all that could come out of her mouth was just a sigh. She has lost her voice……

The doctors says that the impact on her brain has caused her to lose her voice. Listening to her parents’ comfort, but with nothing coming out from her, she broke down.

During the stay in hospital, besides silence cry,…..it’s still just silence cry that companied her. Upon reaching home, everything seems to be the same. Except for the ringing tone of the phone. Which pierced into her heart everytime it rang. She does not wish to let the guy know. & not wanting to be a burden to him, she wrote a letter to him saying that she does not wish to wait any longer.

With that, she sent the ring back to him. In return, the guy sent millions & millions of reply, and countless of phonecalls,.. all the girl could do, besides crying, is still crying….

The parents decided to move away, hoping that she could eventually forget everything & be happy.

With a new environment, the girl learn sign language & started a new life. Telling herself everyday that she must forget the guy. One day, her friend came & told her that he’s back. She asked her friend not to let him know what happened to her. Since then, there wasn’t anymore news of him.

A year has passed & her friend came with an envelope, containing an invitation card for the guy’s wedding. The girl was shattered. When she open the letter, she saw her name in it instead.

When she was about to ask her friend what’s going on, she saw the guy standing in front of her. He used sign language telling her “I’ve spent a year’s time to learn sign language. Just to let you know that I’ve not forgotten our promise. Let me have the chance to be your voice. I Love You. With that, he slipped the ring back into her finger. The girl finally smiled….

Unnoticeable

I cry my invisible tears
Scream my silent screams
No matter how hard I try
I will always go unseen

Alone in the darkness
Just me and myself
I reach for my sanity
Put up on a shelf

I open a box
Take out my relief
They see it shimmer
Their mouths dropp in disbelief

The sharp, cold blade
Feels good against my skin
I’ve lost all hope
As I die from within

The cold metal
Slides across my wrist
As blood seeps out
I cannot resist

As blood pours out
I do it again
My heart is broken
It can never be mend

I feel useless
As death holds me tight
As you finally realized
I died last night

bhaet post m yan